Even though I would never have asked for what happened to my husband and our family and friends I can now reflect on all that has occurred and see how much I have benefited and grown as a result.  In honor of this just-passed Thanksgiving holiday, here is my “top ten” list of ways this life-changing event helped me grow into who I am today:

1.  Because I was thrust out of my comfort zone into the unknown world of TBI, I dove into myself and got to know the good and the bad.  As a result, I now like what I see and embrace all aspects of me fully.  As a result I also accept others in my life more readily and easily; I realize that people come into my life to acquaint me with myself. I’m grateful.

2.  I was surprised to learn that my husband, even with a fairly significant TBI,  is one of the most normal people I know – what you see is what you get; no games.  He tells it like it is.  And he doesn’t hold onto feelings and emotions and readily sees the absurdities of life.  He pretty much lives in the moment.

3.  My husband’s accident and resulting injury made me face myself and my life and see through what was and wasn’t real and true.

4.  I became a better parent, wife, friend, daughter, sister …

5.  I became more open, patient, honest and accepting of pretty much everything in my life and world.

6.  I discovered that I am not a victim of any situation or circumstance in my life.  I am responsible for my happiness; happiness is an “inside job”.

7.  Even though I don’t have control over difficult things such as my husband’s accident, I know I always have a choice as to how I can face any life situation.

8.  My husband’s accident showed and continues to show me what the possibilities are for my/our life.

9.  I have a much better sense of humor and am much more relaxed in my approach to life.

10.  As I mentioned above, I would not have wished this on us, however, I’m grateful for the lessons I’ve learned and those lessons to come.  It is all perfect, this life.

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